Everybody Is In Consensus That Chinese Food Is Better Cold The Next Day, Correct?
Before we get started here, obviously I could have continued to search Google for a more “visually appealing” photograph of take out Chinese food. But we all know the shittier it looks, the better it tastes. That’s just a fact of life.
So if you’re living on the east coast, chances are you had yourself a nice little snow day yesterday. One of my favorite traditions on snow days is glue your ass to the couch, throw on a few episodes of whatever, get a little snow load on (yesterday’s beverage of choice was Lagunita’s Little Sumpin’ Sumpin’) and order Chinese food. My go-to order is always General Tso’s chicken and I’d rather die getting burned alive by small individual matches than ever order anything else.
But as I’ve grown older, I’ve also grown wiser. So while a young Jordie would only order enough Chinese food for dinner that night–older, wiser and more mature Jordie has figured out that even though Chinese food is delicious that night when you order, it’s roughly 45 thousand times better the next day straight from the refrigerator.
For some of you reading out there, I may have already lost you. I feel like there are two types of people in the world. People who can eat cold pizza and those who can’t. I’m a fan of almost anything cold, pizza especially. Heck, I’ve even contemplated getting out of the blog life just so I can open up a cold pizza shop. I think that shit would kill. But yes, Chinese food is the same as pizza. Some can eat leftovers cold, some are a bunch of weak ass bitches who need to reheat them. It really all comes down to mental toughness.
But now my life has come down to a pretty critical dilemma. When I order Chinese food, do I either A) try to practice some sort of self control and not eat the entirety of my order so I still have some cold leftovers to devour the next day? Or do I B) order my regular for dinner but on top of that make an additional order for breakfast/lunch the next day? Obviously this dilemma would have a pretty simple solution if money wasn’t taken into consideration. But since money doesn’t grow on trees and apparently it’s frowned upon to not pay rent every month, here I am.
The moral of the story remains the same regardless of how much I do or don’t order, however. Chinese food, while perfectly fine for dinner, is always better cold the next day. You’d be a fool, and quite frankly a piece of shit, to disagree.